Danish marketers arrested, beaten in North Korea

[Angry Former Employee]

Two marketers at the Danish recruiting firm Swarsgard & Leiberflubben were arrested and savagely beaten in North Korea this week when local officials discovered they were in violation of international CAN-SPAM laws.

A spokesman for the Korean SSSEOWLYU (Stop Sending Spam Email Or We’ll Lock You Up) organization declined to comment on the case, but an official press release from the office of Dictator Kim Jong-Il contained this brief, cryptic message:

“North Korea takes the issue of Permission Based Marketing very seriously – and we’ve read all of Seth Godin’s books. Spam email from a Danish recruiting firm will be taken as a direct threat from America to the Korean people, and will be met with swift retribution. America’s King Bush needs to tell the world that spam effects everyone, even people who don’t have email, computers or even basic human rights.”